Understanding Egyptians

Well, I hope I haven’t misled you with my title.  This is not about peace treaties or terrorism or anything of the sort.  No, this is how I have come to understand why Egyptians worshipped the cat.

Yes, that’s right, I have been converted.  Well, I guess converted is the wrong word since I was never really a cat hater, I just never really gave them much thought, one way or the other.  Sure, we have four of them, but that was not really my doing.  I just accepted them as belonging there like the rest of our menagerie.  That was before I knew.

I never knew what these lovable, likable, respectable, admirable creatures could do.  They can find and catch and kill mice before you even knew you had any.  These mighty and ferocious and worthy hunters’ actions should be considered laudable by all.  Even their prey should be in awe before their greatness.

We didn’t know that we had an old box of Boy Scout popcorn left in the garage somewhere.  We found that out later.  Or that they can sqeeze through a space of 1/4″.  Over a period of couple of months each cat caught at least one mouse, but Fraidy Cat and Cookie caught two.  Once we discovered their little food stash we were able to get rid of the food source and toss out their nest and lay sticky traps for them.  Sticky traps, if you buy a name brand and not the dollar store brand, work really well.  It can be a little gross but you have to realize, these are vermin.  They will destroy everything you have.  Curse the early cartoonist, W.D., who anthropomorphized and immortalized them!  Vile Wretch!  They are not cute, they are destructive, despicable pests and if they had a cute girlfriend she would be pregnant every 21 days, with a litter of 6+ each time.  They start breeding at 6 weeks old and can breed for up to 12 months.  One Mickey and one Minnie can 5 – 10 litters per year.  And then to think that there are some in Colorado who want to preserve the nasty little critters as endangered!  Bald Eagles are endangered.  Tigers are endangered.  Maybe some plant species can be endangered.  NO MOUSE WILL EVER BE AN ENDANGERED SPECIES!!!  It is a political lie by fools and extremists.  So what if the Preble’s Jumping Meadow Mouse becomes extinct!  GOOD RIDDANCE!!!  These are people who have never seen what a mouse can do and will stop an entire state’s economy for the despicable little critters.  It is worse than the Snail Darter fiasco!  I have seen before what they are capable of and believe me, if you have ever seen the damage these rodents, these varmints, these icky little germ carrying aliens can do you would sing my same song.

Um…I don’t like mice, can you tell.  I especially hate Mickey and Minnie.  Feivel would have been married a long, long time, and he would not have been cute.  Stupid anthropomorphic cartoons making people feel sorry mice.  Yuck!

So.  Knowing what they are capable of, I cannot tell you the joy that filled my heart when I found out what one of the girls was screaming about.  Far from being murdered or mortally wounded, it was only Fraidy Cat, who had caught and killed a mouse and wanted to share his new toy.  I took his picture (I’ll post it if I can find it) and told him what a wonderful and heroic and mighty and noble creature he was and chastised the girl for not letting him put it in her bed.  He was so proud.

Next came Bagheera.  The sleek, handsome black panther.  Mighty, stealthy, jungle-killer, he decided that since shoes are important to Abigail, his momma, that the place he should leave his trophy would be her shoe box.  She didn’t quite agree, especially since she didn’t know he had done it until she went to get that pair of shoes.

Fee-Foe, the lionhearted lioness, queen of all cats caught a big fat momma mouse and gave it to me.  Beautiful, beautiful Fee-Foe, ruling lioness of the pride, would deign to share her majestic prize with me.

In the meantime we were doing our part by finally finding what had brought all this on and trapping several.  Don’t even bother thinking about suggesting live traps.  The only way I would do that is if there was a lab that needed wild ones for some purpose.  The glue traps are very effective along with taking away the food source and cleaning up the area of all nests and nesting materials.  It was a team effort.

Not to be outdone was Cookie, the purebred La Perm we were given.  La Perms are not descended from any of the other curly-haired breeds but are rather descended from barn cats.  Yes, a full-breed cat that comes from the most venerable of all feline races, Barn Cats.  Cookie insisted on living up to her heritage and doing it proud.  She could not be coaxed so easily into giving up her earnings, however.

“Cookie.  Give me the mouse, please.”

“It’s mine.”

“I want to get rid of it.”

“No.  I am going to put it on Janet’s pillow.”

“Janet doesn’t want it on her pillow.”

“Of course she does.  She gives me treats doesn’t she?”

“Yes.”

“She scratches me, doesn’t she?”

“Yes.”

“She treats me like the royal creature I am, does she not?”

“Well, sure, but…”

“So, it is written that I must share my prize with her when I have done with it and that’s what I am going to do.”

“She doesn’t want it in her bed, she wants it in the trash.”

“Vile knave!  Wouldst thou dare try to remove it from my mouth!  It goes on her pillow and that’s final.”

A struggle ensued, and really, it probably would have been wiser to wait until she dropped it on Janet’s pillow, but I didn’t and finally, as I was trying to gently tug it out of her mouth she let go of it to bite me!  She was mad!  Oh boy was she mad!

But I’m not mad.  She didn’t hold a grudge forever, just a few days and it has been several weeks since there has been anything in the traps or since the cats have caught anything, so I am hoping that this episode is over.  But now I can say that I love, like, admire, respect and care about these mighty, ferocious, worthy hunters.

FraidyCatandMouse01Go Fraidy Cat!  FraidyCatandMouse02

^       ^
>>*<<

When I told my dad this story he said that one time my mom had seen a mouse in their kitchen and started screaming for him to come and kill it.  It ran under the fridge, so he took a yardstick and started sweeping back and forth under there.  The thing ran out and my mom screamed again and jumped up in the air…and landed right on top of the mouse.  “That was the end of that mouse, Herbert.”

Remember, the good book says, “I hates meeses to pieces!”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.