Blogging A – Z Challenge 2022: D Is For Delayed Start & Dad

Herb’s Blog, Herbdate 22703 – 952

Here’s the haps:

I was over at Jacqui Murray‘s blog, Word Dreams, and realized that I had missed the start of this year’s challenge. If you were unaware of her site it is well worth taking a look. She has stuff for educators, writers, stuff about her work-in-progress, tech tips, and just all kinds of cool stuff. And she’s nice. I was reminded of the A – Z challenge when I visited her blog.

Anyway, I really wanted to do this again this year instead of waiting seven years this time. The question was where did I want to start? I could start at A and try to catch up that way or start with the day that it is and catch up somewhere in the middle. The challenge is to write a post every day in April except Sunday. So, thinking I was way behind I decided that since today is the fourth and D is the fourth letter I should start there. Except when I looked at a calendar I realized that today should really be C and I’m not nearly as far behind as I thought.

I had a little bit to say about it being April Fourth and starting with D so I will straighten out the rest of the mess as I go along.

April Fourth, 2009, was the day my dad died. I’ve talked about him here before and the fact that we have since discovered that I am not biologically related to him (Imprinted). My dad was not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. I could dwell on the not-so-wonderful-awesome-sauce side and fill my children’s and grandchildren’s heads with stories full of bitterness and unforgiveness or I could look at him as a man who was flawed but did the best he could. I realize that not everyone has the luxury of that choice but I do. I also know that in any situation, even the most horrible, forgiveness puts the power back in your hands. “To give up resentment or claim of requital.”

I had an awful lot more that I was thinking and feeling but I’m not quite able to articulate them. I’ve seen what it looks like when someone is bitter and unforgiving toward a parent and it’s not nice at all. As humans, we may not have the ability to forget (unless you’re like me then sometimes a short memory is a blessing) but we do have the power to give up resentment or claim of requital.

“Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.”

(Col 3:13 KJV)

24 Comments

  1. Being a Christian means being able to forgive. It’s a thing that’s lacking in the culture at large today. People tend to forget how important that is. It’s hard, but it’s also essential.

  2. This is an excellent start, Herb. As one who likes to do things my way (and am doing so in my own AtoZ Challenge), kudos to you! I agree about Dads, had one similar to yours–not perfect, not even meh, but did the best he could. Dorothy died young. I hope that was her choice.

    Thanks for the shout out!

    • You’re welcome. I like what you do.
      She lived a hard life and along with physical ailments she battled mental illness as well.

  3. Good advice – forgive. It’s that hot coal thing – the only person that gets burned when you carry around the hot coal of bitterness is the person who carries the coal.

  4. You practice what we all like to preach. My Dad was born on April 4th. He was a good man and a good father but that left me with little to forgive. I am giving my sons a bigger target so that they can experience the joy of forgiveness.

  5. Thank you for sharing. Yes, giving up resentment is a good thing and very laudable. I would say write about it first and forgive it later. Writing will help the forgiveness.

  6. My mother’s home life wasn’t ideal, either. I’m so happy your stepfather was such a standup guy. I read your post about him that you linked to as well.

  7. Dad Death is a tough topic to start out on. It takes a long time for most of us to figure out that our parents were flawed people who, for the most part, did the best they could after being raised by other flawed people.

    • I agree. I think when we are younger and don’t have as many life experiences we feel like we can pick at the flaws but as time goes on you realize what you have said.

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